Tinder: A Crutch For Lonely Pakistanis Looking For “A Good Time”
There’s a reason Tinder has gained massive popularity in Pakistan over the past few years and so many horror stories are coming to light. The app uses geographical data to match you with a potential beau. It’s made “swiping right” on an attractive person so easy, that you rarely think about the repercussions.
Moreover, let’s be honest, Pakistanis are unnaturally policed when it comes to their desires. From really useless rules about maintaining a six-inch distance between students to being socially shamed if you go out on a date. It’s only natural that it would lead to an increase in “hookup culture”.
Case in point: Last week, Pakistanis witnessed the worst public falling out of their favorite social media couple, @theMewlyWeds. Hira Mannan, the woman behind the famous social media account, took to Twitter to publically expose her unfaithful husband.
For those of you that don’t know about the couple, Hira and Waleed came to public attention when they went to dinner. It wasn’t an ordinary dinner you see, Hira took her husband, Waleed, to dinner in a burqa! It was the wackiest thing Pakistanis had ever seen and from then onwards they couldn’t get enough of the couple.
However, as we soon found out, all good things must come to an end. The now-deleted tweets chronicled the tale of how Hira found out about the affairs that had started soon after their marriage and how she tried dealing with them.
…my husband was whoring around on Tinder and SO MANY of these women that he engaged with MUST HAVE SEEN US AND LAUGHED AT ME.Hira Mannan (@themewlyweds) September 21, 2019
I now see what a joke I’ve been in name of love and marriage, and it disgusts me to the core.
By highlighting her personal struggles Hira helped bring attention to the “cheating phenomena” that’s on the rise in our society. Not that it wasn’t common before, it’s just that brave women like Hira are just starting to come out with their stories.
They’re helping other vulnerable individuals by inspiring them to get out of an unhappy situation. By letting them know it isn’t their fault that someone woke up one day and decided they didn’t love them anymore. There’s no shame in parting ways with someone who’s been gaslighting you.
We’re glad Hira raised her voice! You can help her out by contributing to this fund that’ll help her during this distressful period in her life.
Things To Consider Before You Resort To Being Unfaithful:
You’re putting everything at stake. Your reputation, the life you’ve built around you and most importantly, you’re losing the trust of people that love you.
Once a cheater always a cheater, as the common saying goes. There is impulsiveness and narcissism involved when you cheat. You’re throwing caution to the wind. You’re confident that you’re not going to get caught. It’s like muscle memory. Unless you get help it’s very hard to get yourself out of the constant cycle. You don’t want to be labeled as “the person who can’t be in a stable, committed relationship”, now do you?
There’s always a choice. If you’re unhappy walk away. There’s no need to cause another human being emotional turmoil because you haven’t achieved emotional maturity yet. Go to a therapist and figure things out, no need to be self-centered about it. There’s no shame in admitting you have a problem.
Communication is key. If there’s something bothering you be respectfully vocal about it. Work it out and try to move past it. Compromise is a two-way street. You can’t expect to get your way all the time.
Pleasure is fleeting. Do you know what’s more important than fulfilling your momentary lust? Faithful companionship. A good relationship is about being faithful and being there for each other through the good and the bad. A cheap one-night stand can only give you so much release. Find happiness in the simpler things in life and you’ll be content with what you have.
When you make something taboo it only increases curiosity. Have educated conversations with the people around you. Establish meaningful connections with the people you’re interested in and stop taking the easy way out. It can only last for so long.
Areesha Khan harbours a burning passion for writing. This is what she has to say for herself:
I’m your average Pakistani Millennial who loves binge watching trash-TV. When I can, I try to widen my horizons and watch profound works of cinematography as well. In the wild, I can be found sniffing my weathered paperbacks. I regularly obsess over true crime (much to the chagrin of my friends) and love discussing it unprompted. I’m currently working on my undergrad and would love to have a profession in print media.
View my Portfolio: https://areeshakhancontentwriting.journoportfolio.com/
Come say HI on Twitter: @AKhanWrites