Fathers are a precious gift bestowed upon children. A father is the one who gives up the comfort of his bed for his children so that they can sleep comfortably on it, he is the one who puts in day and night of hard labour to ensure that his children have food on their plates every day. A father makes sure that his children are content and protected from all the ruthlessness of the world even when he has to adopt a harsh tone. A father is a shield-a mantle-that offers protection from all the evils and the darkness of the world.
However, at times we do find our fathers disagreeing with us and not being understanding about certain things. At times we are not able to communicate with him directly. The words just vaporize from our mouth as soon as we spot his unrelenting expressions (that tend to intimidate us). Often there is a communication gap between father and children while at times due to the huge age gap it is difficult to make him understand our perspective. Well, on this father’s day we compiled a list of 5 things that we wish our fathers understood.
1. Times Have Changed And So Have Career Options
Dear Dad, it might have been different in your age, but times have changed now.
While being an engineer, lawyer, or doctor seems a very attractive option for some, not everyone is wired to become one of the above. With the increasing use of social media and more use of technology, there is a massive shift in the structure of jobs that would result in some jobs becoming obsolete while for career paths like software engineering and digital marketing, more opportunities would open up. In addition to this, social media has opened up new career paths like PR managers, social media Influencers that are earning decent incomes.
This reflects on how things have evolved in the past couple of years and it is necessary to understand that not all children can do the same thing. While some have a more logical grip over things others are naturally more creative. Thus, it is necessary for fathers to help their children discover their passion and guide them on how to pursue it from an early age. Backed up by parents’ support children can certainly achieve more than what is expected of them!
2. Technology Is Now A Part Of Us
Dear Dad, embrace the changes in life, even if its means going digital!
Embracing technology can be hard for our parents, and what can be harder is when they refuse to acknowledge how daily tasks can be done more efficiently and quickly with technology in hand. For example, the use of social media. It will be fun if our fathers can for some time sweep the negative impacts of social media under the rug and take into account what this unexplored world has to offer. For instance, getting an Uber for work, or using GPS to go to places rather than asking strangers on the road (which can most certainly be dangerous) or using social media for effective marketing.
There are countless examples however, it’s just about acknowledging the new lifestyle and fully taking advantage of all the prospects it has to offer. While our youth should undoubtedly limit the use of social media and access technology to the point that it becomes harmful, fathers should likewise see that there is no wrong in accepting its benefits.
3. Our Struggles Don’t Match But We Certainly Have Them
Dear Dad, our struggles are different from yours, but they are still quite a bit for us!
Have you heard your father saying how long he would walk to go to school every day? Or how there were no phones during his teenage to talk to his friends all day? Or how things were during his time and now how much has changed? And that we never had to go through the daily struggles he went through as a child? Well, I certainly have!
We do acknowledge as children that we have better access to technology, health care, education and betterment in other prospects of life has certainly made our lives easier. It is true that we don’t have to wake up early in the morning to walk to school or that we don’t have to go to libraries to do basic research; however, as teenagers and young adults of this generation, there are many things we go though which were non-existential in our parents’ time.
For instance, the concept of cybercrime and cyber harassment is the problem of modern-day. Children have the pressure to maintain a certain presence on social media to be described as ‘cool’. Today’s children have enormous pressure from their peers to act a certain way and unfortunately have to go through bullying which due to social media is not limited to being verbal or physical but also online. According to National Center for Educational Statistics, 2019 One out of every five (20.2%) students report being bullied.
Moreover, there is undue pressure on students and they not only have to ace their exams, but also have to socialize, do extracurricular activities and other activities to keep up with students their age. If our fathers recognize our efforts and what we have to struggle with would make us children feel happier.
4. Mental Health Is Real!
Dear Dad, taking care of our mental health is part of living in the modern age.
Whether you believe in it or not, whether you think it is hyped up or under-discussed, mental health is a real issue of modern age!
According to Adda, In 2017, around 17.3 million adults age 18 or older in the U.S. had experienced at least one major depressive episode in the last year (6.7% of adults in the U.S.). This shows that mental illness is a real thing. Many celebrities have publicly addressed their mental illnesses and now more and more people are talking about depression as a real illness. However, still in many households especially are desi homes, mental health is taken for granted.
Our parents need to understand that sometimes their child can need medical attention. We plead our parents and especially our fathers to develop an atmosphere in the house where the child can openly talk about their problems. In addition, fathers should take it upon themselves to learn about the symptoms of poor mental health and irregular human behavior, so that if they feel that their child is not their normal self they can try and talk to them or maybe get professional advice if necessary.
5. While We Love And Adore You, At Times We Just Want A Little Privacy!
Dear Dad, privacy is also a thing for us, and we understand it might have been non existent in your age.
Parents especially can have a hard time understanding that their children would want a little bit of time to themselves. Locking the room does not indicate that they are up to something mischievous but instead, it may be just because they want a little bit of time to themselves. On the other hand, children at times would prefer to hang out with friends more than spending time at home. Understand that it’s natural and they just feel especially in their teenage that their friends can understand them better. Thus, try to give us our space and we will certainly revert back to you with more kindness and love!
Well, we wish all the fathers and all the fatherly figures who have been kind, supportive and have showered unconditional love upon us a very happy father’s day! We do hope that you enjoy your day to the fullest and with these tips you can develop a stronger bond with your child.
Any child reading this, you may just share this article with your father to tell him indirectly how you feel your relationship with him can improve. In the end, we do hope that all children and their parents enjoy a nourishing and loving bond that grows stronger with every passing day!
4 Life Lessons I Learnt From My Abbu, Which Stay With Me Today
Zainab Mossadiq is an A level student. She has a passion for writing. She believes that through writing we are often able to convey the message we might never say and unveil a hidden side of ourselves. “Writing helps me unwind. It allows me to explore a different side of my personality and to forget what’s happening around me. I hope that through my writing I am able to bring a positive influence.”
So true, and in addition to our fathers, our hope is everyone around us including our sisters and mothers also get this about us!
Absolutely!